The human heart will seek to be known, understood and connected with above all else. If you do not connect, the ones you care about will find someone who will. This could be a spouse, family member, friend, partner or employee. Here are a few thoughts on how to make sure that the people you care about feel known, understood and connected:
- An effective leader has the character to get out of oneself long enough to know, experience and value the other person.
- True listening and understanding occurs only when the other person understands that you understand. This can be accomplished by mirroring back what you just heard, having the other person acknowledge that you did in fact hear what they said. Then you are able to step out of your own experience to empathize and connect with the other person in their experience. Listen in a way that communicates understanding.
- To empathize and validate what someone is experiencing does not mean that you agree or even think that the other person is right. It just means that it is valid that you see it as their experience. To empathize with and validate someone’s experience shows respect.
When you think about leadership, think about making the people you care about feel known, understood and connected.